Things that make me smile a little less than last week:
- Personal admin. It sucks. I procrastinate. It gets worse. I procrastinate more. I eat bags and bags of fizzy cola bottles and my tongue bleeds so I have to have a lay down, and then find very interesting things to watch on telly (I used to be fat, World’s strictest parents, Bargain Hunt), and I invent household chores that just must be done instead. Which shows you just how much I hate admin, because I hate chores, muchly!
- Parking fines. Grrrrrr.
- Parking fines, specifically from parking at the gym. As if it wasn’t hard enough to motivate myself already – now if I spend too long in there I get fined £80. Encouraging no?
- Being unable to find the shoes I want to complete my last wedding outfit. I’ve bought five pairs so far this week and returned four…
- One pair of Vivienne Westwood Lady Dragons in pink PVC with peach heart detail on the toe. I just didn’t love them as much as my trusty blue and red ones so they went back. Not before I offered them to our general manager for a sniff. They smell of bubblegum, OBVS!
- A pair of lovely corally-pink almond toe platforms. They had such potential. Turned out to be stripper shoes. Bleurgh.
- Red suede almond toe courts. Red shoes no knickers. That is all.
- Pink suede courts. Identical to my existing Louboutins. Unjustifiable.
- So, come oooooon, SamCam’s nude, suede t-bar sandals from the Royal Wedding. I’m counting on you!
- Nicky Gee working all over the long weekend. Poo bums.
- Geordie Shore*. I know I'm going to get as addicted to this as I am to TOWIE and MIC, but the problem with this one is that I've only just weaned myself off the Cheryl Cole intonation and turn of phrase after the last series of X Factor ended in December. Now, my "head voice" has a Geordie accent.** I can't stop saying my name as "Vic-ee" with Chezza's accent. Damn them!
- Having an office-based job. Hate having to sit inside during sunny afternoons whilst my stalkbook friends post pictures of paddling pools and sun-drenched gardens. (However in the winter I will be mucho grateful for my office-based job so I retain the right to alter this one)
- Generally just not being a millionaire. Being a millionaire would solve all of the above. Almost.

But at the end of the day, it could be worse. Everything I touch could turn in to Skittles.
Night night YooMooers
x* my thoughts on this coming soon... but to start with "spoonin' turns in ter forkin' dunnit?" Amazeballs!
** Everyone has a "head voice" right?
I soooooo want a yoomoo now! it sounds lush!
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